resources For the Grieving Father or Partner
Reach out to tell your story and to hear other stories like yours. There is no one who understands your pain as deeply and fully as someone who has also lived it.
- For immediate help, call a grief support hotline.
First Candle Grief Support 1-800-221-7437
- Reach out to other fathers who have lost a child. This may begin to happen naturally. Once I posted a message on Facebook about Charlotte, two women that I already knew reached out to me to tell me that they had experienced similar losses. Another friend gave my email to a coworker of hers who was the mother of a stillborn baby as well. These three women (one of whom was a complete stranger and two with whom I had interacted very little before) wrote me many heartfelt messages, listened as I told my story over and over again, and provided support in a deeper way than others were able to. It sounds strange, but this tragedy will open your life up to new friendships with people who have survived the same trauma. These new friendships are important because every other relationship in your life will feel like it has shifted.
- Join an online or face-to-face support group. If you do not feel ready to pour your heart out yet, it may be helpful to hear someone else tell their story. The more that I heard other parents tell about their losses, the more I felt hope that I would be able to survive this. I would be changed, yes, but still able to live a life that is full and meaningful.
FACE TO FACE SUPPORT GROUPS:
Compassionate Friends Meeting Locator
ONLINE SUPPORT GROUPS:
- Bereaved Parents of Perinatal Loss is a live, online support group (via videoconferencing) that is facilitated by Debbie Fischer, LAMFT and sponsored by the Star Legacy Foundation. It takes place on the 1st and 3rd Monday of each month at 7:30 pm eastern/6:30 pm central/5:30 pm mountain/4:30 pm pacific. Registration is just required for the first session, but participants are emailed a reminder for sessions that take place after that.
- Stillbirth and Infant Loss Support Group (Closed Facebook Group)
I'm Still Standing (Public Facebook Group moderated by Still Standing Magazine)
Compassionate Friends Online Support Groups/ Live Chat Rooms
Compassionate Friends Private Facebook Page: Loss of a Child
Compassionate Friends Private Facebook Page: Loss to Miscarriage or Stillbirth
- Accept help from family members and friends who reach out to you. It is ok to tell them that you aren't ready to talk or visit yet. People understand that you are facing a traumatic event. Keep communication open so that they are still there when you are ready.